This post is taking a little bit of a different weekend recap spin. We had our 10 year reunion and Homecoming this weekend at Wofford College, and it got me thinking more about friendship. Unfortunately, not all of our closest friends from college could make it, but we still decided to go and make the most of it. And going back to College, like for so many, brings back so many memories.
It is so easy to take our friendships for granted. We assume that everyone has their “people” and their best friends that they can call on with anything and truly lean on. Sometimes it can seem like friendships just happen and they are natural, but as we get older, even some of those same friendships that were formed so easily, now require a little bit of work to maintain them. Ok, maybe even a lot of work. You have to nourish them and invest time in them in order for them to grow. Friendship is hard.
I think going back to College reminds you of all the petty, immature relationships you once had, and maybe even shamingly exclusive you could be. I know you can’t always include everyone, but I am now always reminded to try and be aware of where other people are and try my best to fill others up, as I sometimes need it, shoot, as I always need to be filled. Growing up I had definitely been on both sides of this game…purposefully excluding others, and being excluded. I also have been that person and friend that often wanted to include as many of possible, because often (as a trend in my life) I can spread myself too thin and try to be friends with far too many people. What I have realized now, at my age of 32, and I still don’t know much…let’s get real…because I still see pettiness with women on the playgrounds with their kids, at school pick-up, shopping at boutiques, or out at an event sans kids. There is still jealousy, insecurity, and competitiveness amongst women…even as we mature. Disappointing, right!? I honestly remember thinking in high school and college that friendships would be much simpler when I got older and all that “popular”-ness and friendship competition would end, but it still exists. However, now, it’s much easier to let it pass, and remember the people that truly matter.
Since we graduated college 10 years ago there have been LOTS of changes. Some have moved from city to city, some have been through grad school programs, gotten married, had kids, developed careers, etc… We are all becoming different people in some ways and our priorities are changing, and thats ok, because people grow up and they change some. Thankfully, some of the girls I was with this weekend and I are “doing life together”. Consequently, we are in the same stage of life and this makes it easier. We are all married and have kids of toddler age. This makes it much easier for us to get together and be on the same schedule and have the same priorities. But it doesn’t have to be that way either, I believe that those friends that truly love you for who you are still stay connected even when you are not going through the same stages. You may not see each other as much or have hour long phone conversations like you once did, but as long as you work on it, you can maintain that bond that started the friendship you made. At the end of the day, friendships are give and take. So find those that are easy for you to pour into and love, and that will love you back wholeheartedly.
With all that said, I know I am still not the BEST friend I can be ALL the time, but I try. I have made some new, amazing friendships since college, and I continue to cross paths with girls that I feel I would mesh really well with and may be worth investment of my time and energy. But there are also people that although I definitely don’t want to exclude or give them the shaft, just aren’t your people, and that is ok! However, I do try to keep in mind, that some people don’t have “people” and may need them. So keep your heart open. Be honest with others and yourself and love openly. Not everyone has to be your bestie, but everyone needs somebody to talk to sometimes and no one likes to feel excluded. You didn’t, did you?
Be kind. Be real. Love openly. Invest. Fight for the friendships that matter.
All of those thoughts for a simple 10 year reunion. But a weekend well spent with my people. More scenes from our fun weekend…
Friday night, we went to the Terrier Ball at the Marriott Downtown Spartanburg for some food, drinks, and dancing!
OOTN:
Black Blouse (Wren & Willa from Twill) similar // James Jeans (available locally & online at Savvy) // Sam Edelman Pumps
These are some of my all-time favorite jeans. They look like jeans but feel like leggings – LOVE them! Also, I confess I have an animal print obsession. Cannot get enough. Obsessed with these new pumps by Sam Edelman (available locally at Muse).
OOTD:
Equipment Blouse // James Jeans Twiggy Dancer (on sale HERE!!) // Sunnies
TOUCHDOWN
We may have lost, but the boys (and adults) still had a BLAST…and memories were made!!
Love these sweet friendships, even if we are forcing it on them at a young age.
Like most weekends these days, it was exhausting and we weren’t productive in the least, and we may step into Monday already feeling behind, BUT sometimes those are THE BEST kinds of weekends. So thankful for these friends and a fun Wofford Homecoming/10 year reunion! Until next year, Terrier Nation!
XO
Shana
